Friday, August 17, 2007

Blame It On The Moon.


Moon1, originally uploaded by mellow-d)


A very long time ago. In a small town called “little apple” for it was also named Manhattan. They took me to a small mound of a hill and proudly told me “on a clear day, you can see all the way to Wichita”. All I saw was a flat land golden with ripening wheat that stretched for ever until the gold met the blue. It was breathtaking and when the wind blew, it was as if the land moved. Maybe my eyesight was bad, I could not pick out Wichita.


But my eyes picked her up immediately that night they took me to the best chicken restaurant within driving distance from the university. Even before we were seated.


There was a noisy commotion as we joined tables to form one long enough to accommodate all of us. I was the only Asian among the cowboys. My heart was not into the conversation. I was not hearing what were said. It was pounding madly as I made up my mind to approach her.


Her face was shielded by her long hair as she bent over the piano but I knew she is beautiful. Her hands were raised and she plunged them down with dramatic yet graceful flourishes. Fingers flew over the keyboards and melody filled the room. I wished my new-found friends would just shut up and listened. The beers came and cheers were raised. It never tasted so bitter. I was in love.


I stood up and walked over. Prompting loud cheering, hooting and piercing whistles. I ignored them all. I was amazed that in my first trip to a foreign land, my behavior was so uncharacteristically me. I would never dare if this was back in my own country. If I stopped walking, I knew my legs would fail me.


I stopped by the piano as she finished her song. She looked up.


And smiled.


My heart stopped beating. Time froze. The world around us stopped happening. I did not remember whether I ate any chicken that night. If I did, I could not remember its taste. I could not remember how I got home. I only remembered smiling on the bed, unable to sleep. My heart swirling, swept by caressing waves of raw emotions.


Then.


She was a Vietnamese. She was married. My world crashed.


I received a phone call. She wanted to meet. I callously asked why. As if, she had done me wrong. She said she wanted to invite me out to look at the moon. There was a long pause. I wanted to go. I wanted to find out whether there can be anything between us. I fervently hoped.


But I was an honorable young man back then. My first love. My first heartbreak. I gave some silly excuse. She never phone again. And from that night, the moon never looks the same. I know it accused me of betrayal and cursed me with endless heartbreak. And the one songwriter whom I have always wanted to meet is the one who wrote “Blame it on the moon”.


I suspect she is one of those who come to visit.


To be continued...


1 comment:

Unknown said...

We see what our hearts want us to see.
Regrets are challenges deliberately thrown in our path; but we shall march on bravely for like the moon, it never fails to make its appearance when due.