The train was hurtling away, shaking and groaning as it pulled the carriage down the iron track. The unearthly noises it was making alternated. When it was gliding smoothly, it made a low whining sound that combined with the rushing wind into a drawn out moan. Then suddenly without warning, it would gave out loud mechanical coughs that rattled and shook so violently that it threatened to break apart and disgorge the passengers out on the track. It had been doing that for hours; maybe it will hold for another few more until they got home.
He could not sleep. But this did not appear to be a problem for the rest of the passengers. Occasionally, during a quieter stretch; he could even hear the snoring of the fat man sitting opposite him sleeping with his mouth open. In the crowded train, he was the only one still wrestling with his thoughts as nosily as the train is wrestling with the track. He looked at the window and saw his own reflection, sullen and troubled. Why is that face so serious whenever it is deep in thought? He had seen MingYu’s father reflecting and the face was so serene, contented. He felt a clutch at his heart. Just a casual thought of her would raise such a distinct image floating before his eyes. His expression lost its intensity, replaced by a tenderness reserved only for her.
He looked out the window but the rushing night revealed no secrets on this moonless night. The body stirred as it adjusted itself in its sleep and found a more comfortable position resting its’ head on his shoulder. His shoulder is now slightly numb from her weight. He moved it slightly to improve the circulation but taking care not to wake her. He ran his hand gently over her hair and it felt like the smoothest silk. She was dressed in a bright deep blue cheongsam with tiny yellow and pink flowers that only served to emphasize the blue. His favorite color, that of the sea. He knew she was wearing it for him. His simple cotton shirt was the best he had but it paled against her fine silk. He was going home and did not want to keep up the pretense anymore. There was another reason. He watched her carefully to see her reaction on his clothing in the station. But she rushed up to him gleefully (if she is aware, she did not show or care), and grabbed his arm happily. And proudly as if declaring to the world, I am happy he is mine. Because she felt that way, he was also proud to have her hanging on to him although it turned a few heads who are puzzled at the somewhat odd couple; he reflected with a smile.
But now in the rumbling train, with her silent in her sleep. No longer influenced by her contagious enthusiasm and affection; he has time for doubts to creep in. He was brought up in the sea. He can never be away from it for long. How he is missing it already, the smell of taste and salt in his lips. His hair flying in the wind that blasted against his face. It is a simple life but it is a life that fulfills his needs and makes him happy. Can she adjust to it? Will this mundane existence bore her? Can she take the hardship of being a fisherman’s wife? Will love be enough? Will she be jealous of his mistress – the sea? Only she can answer these questions. She was determined. But he has seen how determination has been worn down by time and boredom like rust corroding strong iron. He had spoken to her at length and warned her but she was confident she could make it and determined to try. And he could not deny her that. He hoped that both of them are not making a big mistake.
His left hand fell on the rolled up painting he put next to him on the seat; too precious to be put together with his luggage on the overhead compartment. It was “The Painting of Endless Sorrow”, a painting so rich with irony. The title and the poem within would be considered a bad omen, an inappropriate gift for a new relationship. But Old Man Chen knew the fisherman would not see it that way. They had that conversation, “It is not a grim reminder of my lost. It is a reminder of what I have become from my lost.” So in a nutshell, it reminded us that “we are now older but wiser” and that portends good no matter how much we suffered in the past. The fisherman did not want to accept it knowing how much the old man love that painting and told him that it would not last in the salty air of the coast. But the old man insisted. “It is important to me for you to have it. I wanted to give you something precious for all the trouble we brought you. It is not precious if I have no reluctance to give it away. Please take it.” Tears were in the old man’s eyes and his grips were strong. So he accepted it. The first thing he must do when he got back is to have it framed to protect it.
When they came back from the “Tears of Weeping Willows”, the fisherman and MingYu did not hold hands that night when they slept. Though both were aching to and knew that they would derive comfort from the touch, neither one of them could extend out the hand to touch the other. For they were suddenly have reasons to be unsure of their own feelings. They did not want to be insincere to the other, so they spent the sleepless night tormenting themselves.
As if that was not trouble enough, the next day the fisherman received a note from EnXue requesting for a private meeting. That threw him completely off-balanced. He had not expected it at all and was amazed at her audacity. This placed him in a dilemma and created great turbulence. Should he go or should he ignore the request? Should he discuss this with MingYu or should he inform MingYu if he decided to go? Why did she want to see him? He was afraid to meet her fearing the effect she may still have on him. How can she stir up such emotions in him? It is safer to stay away. Yet he knew he wanted to go, to find out if yesterday was because he was caught off-guard.
He paced up and down, growing more irritable as the moments of the meeting drew near. As he was doing so, MingYu came up to him. Suddenly, before he had time to think, he blurted out “EnXue asked me to meet her, should I go?” MingYu could not check her anger and exploded “What type of question is that?” and she marched out of the room. But she turned back and expelled a loud “Go!” and ran out. That is a no answer. But the fisherman went because of MingYu’s reaction. He had to do it right by her, to settle it once and for all. To find what EnXue wanted and to deny her if it involved MingYu’s happiness.
The meeting place was a villa owned by EnXue’s father. EnXue laughed at the fisherman’s solemn face as he was led into the garden where she was waiting. “You’re late,” she said gaily. He was surprised at how much she had changed in just one day. It was as if she was a completely different person. Where she was cool, restrained, withdrawn, sophisticated, even a little haughty before, now she was open, energized, looking mischievous and a little too happy. “Oh, come on. Relax. I’m not going to eat you” and she laughed, a mirthful laugh. Yes, she had changed – totally. At her merry pleading, he relaxed and said “You’ve changed.” Then added, “Completely”.
She gave him such a warm smile that he felt his knees melting. There she goes again, disrupting the functions of his body. “Thanks to you” spoken so coyly that he felt she is deliberately trying to affect him and succeeding. The meeting has not even started and he had his answer. Yes, for some reason; he has no resistance against her charms.
“I’ve got to go. I cannot stay.”
“Why”
Without mincing his words, the fisherman said “You’re too dangerous.”
“Okay, I’ll stop teasing you. But I’m glad I could affect you” shocking the fisherman with her directness.
“What do you want from me?”
She looked at him with a face full of sincerity. Or was it just good acting? With her, he could not tell. She said gently but seriously “You saved me. You were sent from Heaven to save me. And I want to repay your kindness, with my dedication and my love.”
The fisherman face flushed with embarrassment but his heart was pounding. Why is he feeling this way? He cannot, should not be feeling this way. What about MingYu? He loves her. No, he is running ahead of himself. It cannot be true. He only met her yesterday. She could not love him. What is her motive? His emotions were in turmoil. He looked at her for answers. He saw the warm smile still hanging on her lips but he noticed the tears at the corner of her eyes. She believed in what she is saying. He must get away from her. Not knowing what to say, he said “I love MingYu” to deter her but was not prepared for her response.
“Until yesterday, I thought I love WenCai,” leaving the fisherman to ponder what she meant. “But who MingYu and WenCai really love are each other.”
The fisherman felt a chill preceded by a stab. He was glad for that. It reaffirmed to him that his feelings for MingYu was unchanged. “It did not matter anyway.” He replied defensively.
“Yes, it does now. They are free to love each other. I’ve broken off the engagement.”
“What did you say?” the fisherman exclaimed though he heard her clearly. He got to think this through. He got to think.
He could not sleep. But this did not appear to be a problem for the rest of the passengers. Occasionally, during a quieter stretch; he could even hear the snoring of the fat man sitting opposite him sleeping with his mouth open. In the crowded train, he was the only one still wrestling with his thoughts as nosily as the train is wrestling with the track. He looked at the window and saw his own reflection, sullen and troubled. Why is that face so serious whenever it is deep in thought? He had seen MingYu’s father reflecting and the face was so serene, contented. He felt a clutch at his heart. Just a casual thought of her would raise such a distinct image floating before his eyes. His expression lost its intensity, replaced by a tenderness reserved only for her.
He looked out the window but the rushing night revealed no secrets on this moonless night. The body stirred as it adjusted itself in its sleep and found a more comfortable position resting its’ head on his shoulder. His shoulder is now slightly numb from her weight. He moved it slightly to improve the circulation but taking care not to wake her. He ran his hand gently over her hair and it felt like the smoothest silk. She was dressed in a bright deep blue cheongsam with tiny yellow and pink flowers that only served to emphasize the blue. His favorite color, that of the sea. He knew she was wearing it for him. His simple cotton shirt was the best he had but it paled against her fine silk. He was going home and did not want to keep up the pretense anymore. There was another reason. He watched her carefully to see her reaction on his clothing in the station. But she rushed up to him gleefully (if she is aware, she did not show or care), and grabbed his arm happily. And proudly as if declaring to the world, I am happy he is mine. Because she felt that way, he was also proud to have her hanging on to him although it turned a few heads who are puzzled at the somewhat odd couple; he reflected with a smile.
But now in the rumbling train, with her silent in her sleep. No longer influenced by her contagious enthusiasm and affection; he has time for doubts to creep in. He was brought up in the sea. He can never be away from it for long. How he is missing it already, the smell of taste and salt in his lips. His hair flying in the wind that blasted against his face. It is a simple life but it is a life that fulfills his needs and makes him happy. Can she adjust to it? Will this mundane existence bore her? Can she take the hardship of being a fisherman’s wife? Will love be enough? Will she be jealous of his mistress – the sea? Only she can answer these questions. She was determined. But he has seen how determination has been worn down by time and boredom like rust corroding strong iron. He had spoken to her at length and warned her but she was confident she could make it and determined to try. And he could not deny her that. He hoped that both of them are not making a big mistake.
His left hand fell on the rolled up painting he put next to him on the seat; too precious to be put together with his luggage on the overhead compartment. It was “The Painting of Endless Sorrow”, a painting so rich with irony. The title and the poem within would be considered a bad omen, an inappropriate gift for a new relationship. But Old Man Chen knew the fisherman would not see it that way. They had that conversation, “It is not a grim reminder of my lost. It is a reminder of what I have become from my lost.” So in a nutshell, it reminded us that “we are now older but wiser” and that portends good no matter how much we suffered in the past. The fisherman did not want to accept it knowing how much the old man love that painting and told him that it would not last in the salty air of the coast. But the old man insisted. “It is important to me for you to have it. I wanted to give you something precious for all the trouble we brought you. It is not precious if I have no reluctance to give it away. Please take it.” Tears were in the old man’s eyes and his grips were strong. So he accepted it. The first thing he must do when he got back is to have it framed to protect it.
When they came back from the “Tears of Weeping Willows”, the fisherman and MingYu did not hold hands that night when they slept. Though both were aching to and knew that they would derive comfort from the touch, neither one of them could extend out the hand to touch the other. For they were suddenly have reasons to be unsure of their own feelings. They did not want to be insincere to the other, so they spent the sleepless night tormenting themselves.
As if that was not trouble enough, the next day the fisherman received a note from EnXue requesting for a private meeting. That threw him completely off-balanced. He had not expected it at all and was amazed at her audacity. This placed him in a dilemma and created great turbulence. Should he go or should he ignore the request? Should he discuss this with MingYu or should he inform MingYu if he decided to go? Why did she want to see him? He was afraid to meet her fearing the effect she may still have on him. How can she stir up such emotions in him? It is safer to stay away. Yet he knew he wanted to go, to find out if yesterday was because he was caught off-guard.
He paced up and down, growing more irritable as the moments of the meeting drew near. As he was doing so, MingYu came up to him. Suddenly, before he had time to think, he blurted out “EnXue asked me to meet her, should I go?” MingYu could not check her anger and exploded “What type of question is that?” and she marched out of the room. But she turned back and expelled a loud “Go!” and ran out. That is a no answer. But the fisherman went because of MingYu’s reaction. He had to do it right by her, to settle it once and for all. To find what EnXue wanted and to deny her if it involved MingYu’s happiness.
The meeting place was a villa owned by EnXue’s father. EnXue laughed at the fisherman’s solemn face as he was led into the garden where she was waiting. “You’re late,” she said gaily. He was surprised at how much she had changed in just one day. It was as if she was a completely different person. Where she was cool, restrained, withdrawn, sophisticated, even a little haughty before, now she was open, energized, looking mischievous and a little too happy. “Oh, come on. Relax. I’m not going to eat you” and she laughed, a mirthful laugh. Yes, she had changed – totally. At her merry pleading, he relaxed and said “You’ve changed.” Then added, “Completely”.
She gave him such a warm smile that he felt his knees melting. There she goes again, disrupting the functions of his body. “Thanks to you” spoken so coyly that he felt she is deliberately trying to affect him and succeeding. The meeting has not even started and he had his answer. Yes, for some reason; he has no resistance against her charms.
“I’ve got to go. I cannot stay.”
“Why”
Without mincing his words, the fisherman said “You’re too dangerous.”
“Okay, I’ll stop teasing you. But I’m glad I could affect you” shocking the fisherman with her directness.
“What do you want from me?”
She looked at him with a face full of sincerity. Or was it just good acting? With her, he could not tell. She said gently but seriously “You saved me. You were sent from Heaven to save me. And I want to repay your kindness, with my dedication and my love.”
The fisherman face flushed with embarrassment but his heart was pounding. Why is he feeling this way? He cannot, should not be feeling this way. What about MingYu? He loves her. No, he is running ahead of himself. It cannot be true. He only met her yesterday. She could not love him. What is her motive? His emotions were in turmoil. He looked at her for answers. He saw the warm smile still hanging on her lips but he noticed the tears at the corner of her eyes. She believed in what she is saying. He must get away from her. Not knowing what to say, he said “I love MingYu” to deter her but was not prepared for her response.
“Until yesterday, I thought I love WenCai,” leaving the fisherman to ponder what she meant. “But who MingYu and WenCai really love are each other.”
The fisherman felt a chill preceded by a stab. He was glad for that. It reaffirmed to him that his feelings for MingYu was unchanged. “It did not matter anyway.” He replied defensively.
“Yes, it does now. They are free to love each other. I’ve broken off the engagement.”
“What did you say?” the fisherman exclaimed though he heard her clearly. He got to think this through. He got to think.
To be continued...
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